Guided Meditation -Letting go of the 5 Aggregates with Delson Armstrong at the DO Conference

So we'll just start out with some loving kindness to ourselves. Bring up the loving kindness, allow that to percolate and be there in the heart and let that come up. And then we're going to radiate it. So we'll just allow it to expand, send it out in different directions. Then after that, for a little while, after that's done, when the mind is very settled, then I will guide you through the contemplation practice through each of the five aggregates. So I'll walk you through the form aggregate, and you imagine the form aggregate in terms of your own body as you were when you were an infant, and then when you grew up to become a toddler and then a child, an adolescent, your adult self, so to speak, and then beyond that as you continue to age and grow.

And even beyond that, when your form basically dies, looking at the stages of decay in the body, in the corpse, and letting it go. Then I'll take you through feeling, and that's essentially just listening to my voice, paying attention to any internal feelings, paying attention to the thoughts, seeing how they arise and pass away, realizing that this is just arising through contact, and then letting go through the insight of seeing them as impermanent, dukkha and not-self. Then the same with perceptions, the same with formations, and finally with consciousness. Because consciousness is that which sees the other four aggregates, is aware of the other four aggregates in one way or the other. So you have to be able to let go of even consciousness.

So we will begin. Are there any questions before we start? Clear. Good. I want you all to find a comfortable sitting position. If it's in the chair or on a cushion, whatever works for you. Keep your body straight. Don't slouch. Close your eyes. Put a little smile on your face. A little smile in your mind and in your eyes and in your heart. Pay attention to your breath as you inhale and exhale, and relax. We're going to do a little body scan. Just pay attention to parts of your body.

Notice any tension anywhere throughout your body, and just let it go. Soften it. Relax. Notice any tightness in the shoulders, in the back, and just let it go. Now we're going to bring up the feeling of loving kindness. You can say in your mind, May I be happy, may I be well, may I be filled with loving kindness, may I be free of suffering. And just notice, just imagine a little baby in your arms, just smiling at you, giggling, laughing, just looking at you with innocent eyes, and feel the warmth that comes in your heart. Let the mind just stay there. If you notice any tension, just relax, let it go, soften. Feel the warmth in your heart, throughout your heart. Just bask in that.

Just pay attention to that feeling. If you notice the mind wandering, just recognize that. Let it go, come back to your body, soften, relax, come back to your smile, and bring up that warmth again, bring up that feeling, stay with the feeling. Thank you. If you find your mind starting to tighten or push, or trying too hard, just relax. Let that go. Let the mind and heart expand. Come back to the feeling and just rest in it. Allow it to pervade your heart center like a candle flame, just glowing. If your mind drifts, that's okay. It's fine. That's the nature of the mind. Just recognize that, let it go, relax, come back to your smile, come back to the feeling. And let the feeling grow.

Let the energy pervade your entire heart and let it glow outward throughout your torso, the warmth throughout the torso. Thank you. Thank you. If you find yourself drifting. If you find yourself nodding off, that's okay. That's the truth of the moment. Just recognize that. Let it go. Relax. Let the mind expand. Let the feeling expand. If you're feeling joy, come up. And that's okay too. Let the joy pervade you. Let the joy come up. Don't do anything with it. Let it be. Just come back to the feeling of loving kindness.

The good wishes to yourself. The desire to be happy and to be well. Just stay with that warmth, with that loving and kind energy. Let the mind settle into it. Don't do anything. Just watch. Watch the mind sink into that feeling. There's nowhere to go, nothing to do, no one to be. All is well. Now, we're going to share this loving-kindness. We're going to send it to all beings. Just in your mind, look ahead of you, look to the front of you in your mind, and just say, May all beings be happy, may all beings be safe, may all beings be free of suffering, and share your loving kindness. Let it pervade the forward direction. Let it expand. Don't push it. Just share it. Allow it to be there. Allow it to go in the forward direction, and just feel that. Just observe it. That's it. And as the loving kindness spreads ahead of you, feel the expansion. Now we are no longer in our bodies. Now we are in a conscious space beyond the body.

Just let the feeling continue. Don't do anything. You are a source of loving kindness. You are a light, a lamp of loving-kindness. If your mind is wandering or pushing too hard, just recognize it. It's okay. Let it go. Soften. Come back to your smile. And just let the loving kindness flow again. That's it. Just feel the expansion. Now, bring your attention behind you and let the feeling of loving kindness spread backwards, behind your head. May all beings be happy. May all beings be safe. May all be free of suffering. May all beings be filled with loving kindness. Don't push, just let it flow in the backward direction. If you feel sloth and torpor, if you feel like the mind is wandering around, it's okay.

Now bring your attention to your left. Let your loving kindness flow out to the left. May all beings be happy. May all beings be safe. May all beings be free of suffering. Just let it flow, no pushing. Let it shine out of you in the left direction. If you notice the mind sliding, it's okay. Let it go, relax, come back to the feeling, don't push, just soften, relax into it.

Now bring your attention to below you. Let your loving kindness flow downward to all beings in the ground, in the water, to all beings, to all animals, to all birds and reptiles and insects, to hungry ghosts, beings in the hell realms. May all beings be free of suffering. May all beings come out of their suffering. May all beings be happy and safe. Let your loving-kindness pervade all the lower realms below you. May all beings experience your loving-kindness. Share it with them. Let them experience it. If you notice your mind wandering around, it's okay. Let it go, relax, come back to the feeling, going out to the lower realms. May they all be happy. Thank you.

If the mind starts to slide away, it's okay. Let it go, soften, let the mind remain expansive, and let the feeling of loving kindness pervade all lower beings. If you notice any sloth and torpor, it's okay. Bring a little focus in your mind, straighten up a little. Relax. Settle into it. And let the feeling pervade below you. I don't know. We're going to turn our attention upwards. Let the feeling of loving kindness flow out through the top of your head, out into the sky, out into space.

Just feel it flow, don't push it. Let the feeling go up to the realm of the Four Great Kings, to the Deva realms. Let the feeling go up to the first brahma loka, out into space, out into infinity, beyond One space, out into the second Brahmaloka, out into the third, into the fourth, to the pure abodes, to the Arupa Brahmas, out into infinite space, infinite consciousness, nothingness, and neither perception nor non-perception. May all beings in the higher realms be happy. May they be safe. May they be free of suffering.

May all higher beings be filled with loving-kindness. Let that feeling flow upward, out into space, out into infinity. If you notice the mind drifting, okay, that's fine. Let that go. Relax, soften, keep the mind expanded, clear and light. Let the mind be spacious. Let the feeling flow. I'm going to go to the next one. Notice the mind pushing.

Relax. Soften. Expand your awareness. Let it go. Let the feeling flow out. Remember, there's nothing to achieve here. Nothing you have to be. Nothing you have to reach. Just let the mind be settled. That's it. Now, we're going to come to the awareness of loving kindness around us. Now we are surrounded in a radiant sphere of loving-kindness. An aura of loving-kindness. Let that feeling expand in all directions. May the person in front of you, behind you, to the right of you and to the left feel your loving kindness. May all beings in this room be happy. May they be safe. May they be free of suffering. May they be filled with loving-kindness.

May all beings in this room experience Nibbana. I have a heartfelt wish that all beings in this room experience the cessation of suffering. And let that aura of loving-kindness pervade through you, within you, outside of you, throughout this room. Feel the loving-kindness flow through you. Feel the other's loving-kindness in you. Now you have become one symbiotic aura of loving-kindness. Allow that feeling to expand. And if the mind's trying too hard, relax, soften. Feel the expansion of loving kindness. It's okay, mind is drifting, it's okay, let it go. Just feel the expansion, soften, relax into it. Beyond the body, beyond the mind, beyond this room.

Let the feeling go outward in all directions at the same time. Beyond this building. May all beings in this building. Feel your loving-kindness. Keep the feeling going. Don't push. Feel the expansion. Now, there is no border between your body and the space around you. It's all just loving-kindness. There's nothing else but the feeling. Let the feeling flow out throughout the city and keep expanding. Let it pervade all around you, in all directions, into the sky, throughout the country, throughout the world. May all beings, all animals, all peoples, all nations, everyone, feel loving-kindness. Pervade the entire globe with a powerful aura of loving-kindness. You are that source of loving-kindness, expanding outward in all directions, out into space, out to all the planets in this system.

Let the loving-kindness go beyond the solar system, outward, even further out, out into space, pervading the entire galaxy. Just keep it going. There is no limit. If you notice your mind drifting, relax, soften, come back to the feeling. Allow the flow of the loving-kindness to soften, to relax, to become space itself. Let it all go. No expectations, no goals. Just the feeling. Allow the mind to be suffused with it. To be quenched by it. To release into it. To relax into it. Nothing to do.

Nowhere to go. No one to become. As your mind settles into that, let the feeling be. Now incline your mind towards the aggregates. Look at your body. Imagine yourself in front of your reflection. Notice your face. Notice a DH. Notice it turn into an infant. What does it look like? Notice how the infant moves, what it does.

Notice your body grow up as a toddler, walking around. Notice it becoming even older as a child. Notice how the structure of your body changes as it grows: your hair, your skin. Are you that? Are you the infant? Are you the toddler? Are you the child? Are you the teenager? Notice as the body continues to grow into adulthood. Notice the changes in your skin, in your hair, in your structure. Let the body continue to grow, to age. Notice the wrinkles. Notice how your body ages. Let the body keep aging. That is the nature of the body. Do you want to age? Do you want the body to have gray hair and wrinkly skin, broken teeth?

No. That is the nature of reality. The body arose, and one day it will pass away. And that's okay. That is the reality of this existence. It's okay. I am not this body. I am not the hair. I am not the skin. I am not the muscles. I'm not the eyes, I'm not the ears, the nose, the tongue, the brain. It keeps changing. That is not me, that is not mine, that is not myself, let go. Notice how the body continues to change. And now it is a corpse. Your body is decaying. It is a corpse. It becomes bloated and green and livid. That's not you. Just hair and skin and nails, muscles and bones. Nothing to do with me. And now it decays further, just skeleton. Are you the skeleton? Are you the bones? Are you the joints? These are all just form. Let it go. Look deep into the body, into the hair, into the skin, into the nails, into the bones, made up of trillions of cells.

Are you those cells? Those cells keep going and passing away. Keep arising and passing away. Arising and passing away. Changing all the time. But you're observing it. That's not me. That's not mine. That's not myself. Just let it go, be free of the body, be free of the elements. Now the body has disappeared, no more. Bring your attention to feeling and sensation. Notice the sound of my voice. Pay attention to the moment the sound makes impact onto the ears. Notice it. I'm going to snap my fingers and I want you to notice the moment of contact. Notice that contact and the sensation that arose.

That is not me. That is not mine. That is not myself. Notice what's happening inside of you. The sensations that you're experiencing. Notice how it feels sitting on the chair or on the cushion. The sensation of that, you can't change it. That's not you. Notice the thoughts that arise. You are the observer. Not the thoughts. There's only observing going on.

Did you call those thoughts up? Did you ask them to be there? Let them flow. Just watch the traffic. Thoughts, just watch the stream. Don't enter it. Don't become part of it. Just let it go. And if your mind starts to wander around and look into that thought and become the thought, try to find the point when that happened, and try to find out what was the thought before that, and what was the thought before that, and what was the thought before that?

Were you in that? Did you create that? Did you cause it? This is not me. This is not mine. This is not myself. Let them go. Let all sensations be as they are, because that's how they are. There is no you in that. There is no you before it. There is no you after it. It is just feeling.

In the seeing, there is only the seeing. In the hearing, there is only the heard. In the sensing, there is only the sensed. In the cognizing, in the thinking, there is only the cognized and the thought. I am not in it, I am not it, it doesn't belong to me, let it go. Let all feelings vanish and disappear. Drop them, let them go.

Notice the relief from feelings. That relief also. Drop it. Let it go. Let the mind be free of all experience, all feeling. Now we're going to turn our attention to perceptions. Notice the ideas you have about the feelings. Notice how, when I speak, your mind recognizes my voice. Notice the memories that come up, the concepts that arise. All concepts are dukkha. All proliferation is dukkha. Let it go. It's not worth holding on to. Whatever concepts you have about yourself, about your relationships, about your job, about your career, about your family and friends and enemies, let them go. They're all concepts.

They have nothing to do with you. Relax. All ideas come to that point where the mind is free of all concepts. That is relief. No thoughts. No mind also. Just relax. Soften. This is not me. This is not mine. This is not myself. Let it go. If you notice the mind wandering, that's okay. That's not you. You might be bothered by it. Just relax, come back to the stillness, let it all go. Relax, relax, relax.

Notice all of the decisions that you've made. Take one decision that you've made in your life. One intention. And notice how it came to be. Go back and see what caused you to make that decision. Go back to the source of that, the cause and condition of that. Let it go. All decisions, all intentions, are not me, not mine, not myself. It's just a river flowing. That's it. Just watch the river. All these choices, all these ideas, all these formations, arising and passing away, arising and passing away,

arising and passing away. That's it. Nothing else. Just arising and passing away. There is no me in that. There is no me before that. There is no me after that. It's just formations. Let it go. Relax. Be free of all choices, all intentions. Let it go. Let go of the meditator. Let go of trying to meditate. Let it be. There's just the meditation. Nothing to do, nothing to achieve, nowhere to go, no one to be. Sink into just pure awareness. Notice the awareness. Notice how the mind is aware. Just the observer, silent witness, the background behind everything, and just rest in that. Thank you. Who is the observer? What is that consciousness, that awareness? There is the mind, and there is the meditation, and there is the mind watching the process of meditation. Let the meditation go. Let the mind go. Let the meditator go.

"This is not me. This is not mine. This is not myself." Sink into that emptiness of self. Signless. Nothing worth holding on to. Let go. Just rest. Soften. Whatever comes up, let it be. Let them sink back in. No need to notice or pay attention. Just rest. There is nothing here. No one here. There is no here. No there. No beyond.

No now. Nothing. Let it all go. Soften and relax into it. Rest. Don't look at anything in particular. Whatever arises, let it be. Go beyond, no looking, no observing, no awareness, no attention, no signs, no direction, just emptiness, void of all things, of all formations, void of the conditioned. Relax and let go. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Now there's nothing to do, no effort, no thoughts, no 6R's, no jhanas, no awareness, no states of mind, not even cessation. Let it all go. Relax and rest. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Now, when you're ready, just come back to the awareness of your body, and exhale, pay attention to your breath, sensations around you. And when you're ready, slowly, with pure presence, come back to the awareness of all. And when you're ready, open your eyes. Thank you.